"I'm reading about *insert character here*."- Newspaper, Season 1
Newspaper Zombie, or Newspaper, is one of the many zombies in Plants vs. Zombies Plush. He is the leader of his teammates on the Graveyard Ops, and was also the original soldier class before Steven/Battalion took over. He's also known to be one of the few intelligent zombies alongside with Head Zombie and Dr. Zomboss, thus making him the third-in-command due to finding the Graveyard Ops. He can usually be seen in shenanigans with Coney, whom admires him, but alas, Newspaper tends to easily become annoyed through Coney’s antics.
When Newspaper was alive, he always read his newspaper. He wouldn't look at anything else except his newspaper. One day he walked out into the road, reading his newspaper, and a truck ran him over. Newspaper decided to get revenge, by eating the truck driver's brains!
Newspaper wears a brown coat, brown shoes, and black glasses. He does not wear any pants, but he has boxers with purple and blue stripes. True to his name, he is always holding his newspaper.
Newspaper is normally a bookworm with a desire for closure. This is often shown when he becomes mentally unstable after his newspaper is destroyed just before he finished reading it.
Being one of the original seven zombies, Newspaper has appeared in every single episode of Plants vs. Zombies Plush. He has also appeared on Total Stuffed Fluffed Island Season 2, Drifblim's Derpious Spin-Off Show and Robot Peashooter. Major appearances included in Episode 14 and Episode 32. He even appeared in Total Stuffed Fluffed Island Season 3 Episode 16 as Coney's buddy and was even going to be a potential contestant. Alas, he tied for third along with Freddy Fazbear.
"This is the song about Dr. Zomboss ,about how he'll fail this mission! We tried to kill him with a forklift, OLE!"
"Oh my god."
"Oh no, he's no myth, I rode his fin."
"*Enraged Grunt* GOTTA GO FAST!"
"Good thing we found you Coney."
"I AM THE CHAMELEON KING."
"I'm the priorities man!"
"Everyone, this is the guy who made Mario vs. PacMan part 3 not come out."
"Coney, are you kidding me right now?"
"Oh my god, the songs awful!"
"... My GARFIELD SECTION. I WAS READING THAT!!"
- Newspaper has been cited as one of the smartest zombies.
- He has been cited as smart because of how he can strategize and play Sudoku.
- Newspaper is 100% blind without his glasses.
- Newspaper's speed is a reference to Plants vs. Zombies 2, and the speed of the Newspaper Zombie.